Yesterday I woke up and wanted sweet ice tea. I fought the urge for a few hours but eventually I was like okay I HAVE to make sweet ice tea. Ever had a crazy craving like that?
I got my mister tea machine out and the stuff to make it. I pushed the start button and it brewed. When it was done brewing, I went to put ice in my cup to cool down the hot tea - (Here enters the tragic music)- that is when I remembered I had NO ice.
Our ice machine is broken. EPIC FAIL! I think I seriously wanted to scream nooooooooo! You can't have sweet ice tea with no ice. That should be a law.
Ugh- no big deal I will wait until it is cold. I will be like a pioneer woman and have tea with no ice. I mean if my grand parents did it; I can do it. I put my container in the fridge and about an hour later I am still wanting sweet cold ice tea.
I FORGOT that I had made ice tea BUT remembered that I had no ice; so I got in my car and went to chicken express. I was going to order a large sweet ice tea- 69 cents baby!!!- but somewhere in my thought process I remembered my hubby loves sweet ice tea so I got a gallon instead. I got my gallon and drove home.
I got home and realized (or once again remembered) I have NO Ice and that the tea I just bought is HOT- freshly brewed sweet tea!!! SO what did I do? I got back in my hot car and went back to chicken express and just to get a big cup of ice.
I come home, put my sweet tea on ice, went to put the jug in fridge and now I see the ice tea I made earlier is waiting in the fridge - COLD! (This is where I slapped myself in the forehead and sighed.)
I tell my husband this long story and he is laughing! Then guess what he says "why didn't you stop right here at the CORNER gas station and buy a bag of ICE!!!????" Seriously I can't make this up. I am able to laugh about it now, but yesterday I was wondering what the hell is wrong with me!?
At this very moment I laugh and thought why didn't I even think of that?!? Ice from the corner store!?! Duh.
Do you have moments like that? Do you have moments were you put the milk in the pantry or look for your cell phone WHILE talking on it? Or any other just total moments of complete Duh?
I tend to have a lot of duh moments. I am not called special Kay because it is cute. Some times in these "special" moments I can laugh at myself but most of the time instead of laughter I belittle myself or have negative thoughts about how stupid that "special" moment was. I tend to think the worse of myself and how dumb I am. I then will compare my moment and think so and so would never do that.
I wonder why in those duh moments I can't extend myself some grace. Why on moments when no one got hurt, or when having a little extra ice tea is no big deal I can't remember to give myself just a little grace? Just a tiny bit...
It is not like I remember to give myself grace even when I really mess up. However- in these simple human error moments wouldn't this seem like a good place to start? Seems like giving myself some grace in these small special moments would help me to remember grace in the big moments.
So why do we tend to remember to give others grace but forget ourselves? Is the saying "we are our own worse critic" true? Do we tend to see our flaws so much that when we repeat our bad behavior we just can't face ourself?
Maybe it is easier to talk about grace and teach others about grace than it is to walk in it for ourselves? It is easier to tell others about his wonderful grace and how to walk in because we know not of their stupid special duh moments?
There is no quick book or manual on "how to give yourself grace no matter what moment comes", trust me, I googled it.
However, I do know this. At one time in my life I believed he loved them and not me. I thought he was for them and not me. I knew that he made them but had forgotten me. At one time I didn't know the truth like I know now.
So now in these special duh moments I believe that he is calling out lies and speaking truth. He may at times be chuckling with me when I do some of the things that I do- Like yesterday- but in most cases when I do the things I do and cry instead of laughing he is there, speaking over me in a loving Father tone:
Grace not perfection. I hear him remind me of this daily. Grace not perfection.
So I don't know where you are at today in this journey, but as you remind others about grace, give yourself grace too.
Grace makes those special duh moments; well........ special.
❤KGB