These are the moments I pray they remember. These are the moments I pray for more of. These are the moments I need more of.
I need these moments. These good moments. These moments that are happy and they help me feel like for at least today - I am doing this parenting thing right.
Lately, it seems all we do is wake up, then work/school, come home and eat then sleep and do it all again the next day. Throw in the occasional bad attitudes, daily strong will spirit, doses of chaos and nightly yelling matches and that describes my life to a tee right now.
These years are going by so fast and when we conquer one battle the next battle seems even harder and comes in quickly after the other. My parenting heart grews weary. I seem to run on empty a lot lately. Looking to Him daily with just one more prayer: Lord what do I do? What do I say? What do we do now?
I hope my kids know I adore them and love them... There has been some hard days.
I pray they remember these happy , good moments more over the bad parenting moments that do happen. Just being real but most days I don't know if I am doing anything right.
Grace and forgiveness I remind them of.... I remind myself too.
I am grateful I have them, but wonder what in the world God was thinking when he chose me to be their mom. He reminds me that He made no mistake.
How much therapy will they need? Am I leaving a lasting impact? Am I connecting with them at all? Are they even listening?
These questions on my heart a lot lately...
But tonight I will lay all those questions aside. I will chose to remember these good moments and keep praying for wisdom on the hard moments.
I will keep doing whatever I can everyday to cherish them. Love them. Teach them. Guide them. Prepare them. Show them forgiveness, grace and unconditional love.
I may not always get it right but moments like today open my eyes to just how precious these fast years are and that I won't always get it right but I know the one who will.